Don't you dare miss the party event of the universe, the Overmaster You, Tempt Me! party. If you're like me, you're fed up with being undermastered and cannot wait to get your overmaster on. If you don't own appropriate overmastering attire, worry not. The hosts will provide sexy interpretations of uniforms worn by public servants, airline employees, and custodians (all of whom, apparently, are French).

There's nothing I find sexier than a woman working a remedial job wearing a uniform. When I walk up to the check-in counter at the airport, I ask two questions: "Are there any bulkhead seats available?" and "Will you overmaster me, you filthy harlot, you?"